Much More Mundane Monday's

Its monday.. Why not?

Morning chaps.. Sorry about the disappearance on Friday, some of you must've been bummed(Kate).. I decided to partake in some Friday golf. One of those golf days when your old school organises a day to rekindle friendships with douches, or see old teachers who still to this day make you cackle with laughter( Mr Shaw).. The only thing i disliked about Friday, was the golf.. The golf? Yes, it was dismal, we played at Glendower, Johannesburg, great course, beautiful, alas my swinging was anything but. Although that wasn't the point(so i was told) but at the prize giving it was all about the golf, lucky enough I had a something to cheer about as one of our four ball took top honours, something I thought i had helped with, (Not really!).. My hands look like a blistered 15 year old having just spent a couple of hours in the bathroom by himself with his dad's penthouse.. Blooded and bleeded it was a good time.. The funniest thing about the whole day, is the caddy's we had were wickedly amazing, content to allow us to do anything, they served as our trusted companions, guiding us through bunkers and impossible shots.. Maybe even altering the score card, ha ha.. by the end of the day my caddy was the only one who hated his golfer, he had a polio induced limp which made feel bad for carrying my bag for 18 holes while I cursing my bummed knee complained the whole time..

ha ha.. good times.. 

Dunno if you guys heard about that douche from Chelsea. They call him Ashley Cole.. that he is such nitwit, shot a work experience young man at the training ground the other day.. Cole, the former gunner's man-tiger woods-wannabe-asshole was mucking about with a  two-two air rifle, and did not know it was loaded and accidently shot the kid.. haa ha ha ha.. can you imagine that dudes day? "bye mom, i'm going to my awesome work experience job at Chelsea FC, (later) hi mom at hospital just got shot by no 3, yes that’s the fuck head, Ashley Cole.. yes will be home for supper.. " ha ha.. Come on the blues, sort your shit out.. you guys are basically ffffed.. No title ambitions this year, so sit back and watch Roman...

Just a quick glance at the football issue and the blues.. No not Chelsea.. Birmingham! Yes you beauties! And more than that costa Foster has got the cup 3 times in a row.. ha ha.. that’s more silverware than the gunners have seen in 10 years.. by one crappy keeper(although he played magnificently as he does on cup final days.. its called BMT Arsenal..).. sorry about that chaps.. soon... maybe the premier league... ha ha ha.. Just to rub salt in the wounds.. Obafemi Martins said it was the easiest goal he had scored.. even though it was to win a cup.. ha ha..

To all those teachers over there, i really hope you guys are not ignorant and are paying close attention to the shit storm that is brewing around you.. Some of you have just landed in South Korea and are stoked, others are about to leave(smart).. Just keeping up with what good, ol Kim is doing in the North there.. he is getting ready to do some damage to the 37th parallel.. if you know what i mean, so.. register with the embassy and keep in contact with us..

I'm thinking of you guys daily as that volatile area plays around.. With Kim stating that the south stop sending propaganda over the river.. The south has been littering the river with pamphlets of what has happened in Egypt and Libya trying to start up their own passion into ending tyrant behaviour.. Mmm.. I just don't think Kim will take anything lying down.. he's more of a... NUCLEAR ass wipe who might just press the red button..

Ya the Oscars, didn’t watch too much.. I dig James Franco, i do.. but it was a little tame, although i still ahve Ricky Gervais in my mind.. So hey.. but the Kings Speech did well, kiff 4 Oscars etc.. bla bla.. all the Oscar talk is boring to me.. I just want know to who won and move on, best actor, best actress , etc.. no-best screen play kak.. and I’m sorry that's just me.. go read a heat magazine! ha ha ha..

I've got some news from the Cape Town vision guest writer.. Simon Minnaar.. :

Si Minnaar reporting from the kaap

When I asked TC what I should write about, he replied ‘the 411 in CT...bitches and rugby’. I was stoked to write on two of the things that consume most of my thoughts!
Im sitting here, typing away  and thinking “Shit, this weekend was actually perfect in terms of sport, all the sides i support won, and Arsenal lost in the last minute in a FINAL to some side from the midlands”...life is great! BUT no..it was not perfect, in fact it was far from perfect. The Sharks won. Im not going to go into detail about my ‘dislike’ for them, but ja, their win just ruins everything.
As a Stormers supporter I was definitely a little rattled by the Lions. I personally think they are going to be winning more games than they lose and it’s only a matter of time before that first win arrives. Back to The Stormers, sorry The DHL Stormers, a win is a win. I think that the Newlands faithful have a side that made two finals last year and will be making sure that the supporters are getting drunk for joy rather than depression this season. Im really missing Bolla Conradie though, not for his rugby, but more for his ‘fuck you’ attitude to anyone that grated him! Hahaha, I can imagine Bolla standing on the sideline at Newlands (as a staff member) tripping Pat Lambie and just going ‘Tsek you laatie’.

In terms of suprises, it was good to see the Rebels get a win over the Brumbies. Jeez, I can’t believe Danny Cipriani used to bang Kelly Brooke (okes, go and google her)...AND he kicked the winning penalty for the Rebels on Friday!
I know TC only asked me to write about rugby, but how intense was the cricket match between India and England?? I find it hilarious how there is a deathly hush around the ground when a Pom batsmen hit a six, but if India took a wicket or Sachin Tendulkar so much as took a breathe, the entire stadium erupted! Anyway, the game ended in a TIE which is probably a fair result and a good one for The Proteas.

Ridonculus game..

What can i say about the ‘bitches’!? Well, I can’t speak for the rest of the republic, but Cape Town has seriously gotten it right this summer. Ladies (I’m toning my gangster down), if any of you are reading this, please just keep doing what you are doing!! Honestly, take a walk through the CBD, the beaches, Cavendish square, forries..you name it..there are 10 out of 10s in abundance at the moment. It breaks my heart that I’m no longer at UCT anymore, because the first couple of weeks are all about ‘scoping out the new cheeeeiks ma chaaarna’. I have my sources that have reported a disgraceful amount of hotness walking around. As Jay from The Inbetweeners says “It’s clunge heaven”.

Who Si plays xbox with..

On a serious-ish note, the ladies of Cape Town aren’t rivalled when it comes to mooiness. I’m not even talking about just the born and bred lasses. Cape Town being as diverse..ok im not going to go all PC here..lets be honest..people come to live in Cape Town because it’s the shit!! Sooo, all the ladies of Cape Town are pushing it at the moment. I mean I’ve just re-read this paragraph and I’ve pretty much said the same thing 5 different ways, but it’s because my mind is so warped it’s a joke. Hope this week is full of bitches and ruggas!
Keep it tidy
x

Thanks si, killer stuff..

just to end it off.. If y'all ever go to prison do what this chap did.. he had all kinds of things stuck up his rectum just before heading into the big square cell.. ha ha.. seriously.. think about what you'll need and make sure.. like this clown..

Neil had been sentenced to a short stay in the chookie on a minor drug charge, but he thought it best to take a few luxuries from home with him. And by a few, I mean 30.

When police conducted a routine search, they noticed a condom poking out of Neil’s behind. And what they found was nothing short of amazing.

The condom contained:

• 17 Oxycodone tablets
• one cigarette
• six matches
• one flint
• one empty syringe with an eraser over the needle
• one lip balm container
• one additional unused condom
• a receipt from CVS pharmacy
• and a paper coupon

All up his special place.. Gives a new meaning to ASS man.. hey KG?.. ha ha..

Jam hard and have a sick week!

TAUNTED.

Thick THumbs of THursday



Paris's bday cake before getting tiefed!



Morning of Good, dudes and dudettes.. tis Thursday and and not a day too late.. the best thing about waking up today, was reading about Paris Hilton's 30th party! Oh what a jam it was, you guys should've been there, good times had by all... Who the F cares? What i do care about is the awesome first gate crashed the party and second stole the $2000(R14000) cake.. Yes dudes this awesome character came in, nodded to security, like he was supposed to be there and stole the cake.. He drove around with it, most likely jizzed on it, and then... he went and gave it to homeless people in downtown LA, he cut the cake into 125 slices and GAVE it all away! That is fricken awesome.. this dude is wicked cool.. I wonder what else he has done? Check his facebook page with some pics of the cake and what he did with it here: http://www.facebook.com/notes/paz/let-them-eat-cake/10150126218284777.. fucking legend of chap.. ha ha.. imagine we went to Kenned Kuene's jol and stole a model with sushi? ha ha.. that would be awesome till we tried to share that shit.. lol.. nonone would end up sharing that.. ha ha..

Paris's cake.. bergies loving it!

Air pollution triggers more heart attacks than using cocaine and poses as high a risk of sparking a heart attack as alcohol, coffee and physical exertion, scientists say. Sex, anger, marijuana use and chest or respiratory infections and can also trigger heart attacks to different extents, the researchers said, but air pollution, particularly in heavy traffic, is the major culprit.(DUH).. marijuana? mmm... who paid you to say that?

Air pollution.. yea right"Mam" more MEATLOAF!

This was the above headline and accompanying paragraph about a article saying air pollution is more dangerous then cocaine.. ha ha.. that got me thinking about the budget speech, taxes and what nonsense is said and how we can't always believe crap.. I understand about the dangers of pollution, especially environmental, air pollution is a real threat, i smell and breath weird things everyday, but the research that is described above seems dubious in its attempt to basically highlight all dangers in the world within a few parameters.. they also state some obvious but necessary cause of heart attacks.. but its the degree in which such information is made public, without some sort of advisory capacity in how to read the info.. Next minute there will be some radicalisation of such things by some religious nut, or ANC official trying to change the laws to facilitate such utter KAK.. so, the point? To question every mafucking piece of info(propaganda) that is made public without reputable sources..

Um... "i'm as mad as a hatter"

Have you oaks noticed how leaders of countries have to be some sort of eccentric/sexfreak/daddy issues/god-complex and all? Thats why you have these crazy fucks doing stupid shit.. like your cousin from Libya, Gadaffi.. here are some of his crazy little insiders:

• He is described as a mercurial and eccentric figure, who often avoids making eye contact during the initial portion of meetings, resulting in long, uncomfortable periods of silence. 
• Although he often speaks out publicly against government corruption, he’s about as honest as any other African dictator (how surprising).   
• He travels almost everywhere in the company of a voluptuous blonde Ukrainian Nurse.  
• He fears flying over water as well as staying on the upper floors of buildings.
• Loves flamenco dancing and often fasts on Mondays and Thursdays.
• One of his son’s, Muattasim, who serves as his father’s national-security adviser, has held extravagant New Year’s parties on the Caribbean island of St. Barts, at which Mariah Carey, Usher and Beyonce have been paid ridiculous amounts of daddy’s money to perform (Carey was reportedly paid $1million to sing four songs). http://www.2oceansvibe.com/2011/02/24/so-just-how-crazy-is-gadaffi/

Charlie Sheen Goes On Holiday With His Wife, A Pornstar And Another Woman - Two and a Half Men train-wreck Charlie Sheen is leaving on a tropical vacation Wednesday, taking his wife, his live-in porn star girlfriend and another woman. Sheen’s soon-to-be-ex wife Brooke Mueller moved back into Sheen’s multi-million dollar mansion during the weekend. Also living with Mueller and Sheen are porn star Bree Olson and Natalie Kenly. That's Charlie, this dude just refuses to say no, he is like a musician in the 80s, coke, hookers and ex wives.. ha ha.. Charlie, get the fuck back to work, i dig the show and need it.. If you need some rest chilled, do it.. Invite me to spice shit up! lol.. jokes.. no seriously

Charlie/wife/porn star..bout to go on holiday and f....

Thursday is beginning, and Friday is right behind her.. (ha ha ha).. so its short and sweet and ready for the weekend BABY!

In some angry news, Michael Carrick and Fletcher had a crap day in the south of France last night, while the gunners were somehow able to keep the 1-0 in London.. lucky fuckers.. oh finally SA are playing in the cricket today, fucking finally.. and all the talk has been about the chokers tag(with good reason) but lets just see how well we can do it.. Bookies are hitting 50-1 that sa win both world cups this year.. so R1000 can get you R50 0000... Mmm.. worth taking the odds? (remember winners don't give a fuck abut stopping) they're winners!

TAUNTED.

SA vs Idies today!!

When Weird is Wednesday

Chaps.. morning.. as i hobble along viewing the world in all its splendor, I heard about the Yank couple that was killed by "Jack Sparrow" off the Somalian coast. The couple who had been delievering bibles to various parts of the world, to churches and orphanages were taken hostage and killed with two others on their boat yesterday..I mean for fuck sake pirates, two innocent bible loving delivery people.. They prob had no cash, and yet a life was wasted.. for what?? For sweet fuck all, to let the world know that pirates are CBombs.. and that includes you Jack Sparrow..(4th movie is gonna be awesome).. So basically if your sailing have knowledge of how to defend yourself against gun toting-crazy-Somalian-water thieves!! shit.. I would rather be Bheki Cele.. not..

I always knew there was something fishy about good Cele, the way he carries himself, the way he nearly botched the Dewani case with his outbursts.. he just seems like a slightly dumber but louder version of a Zuma/malema baby, lik if the two men got together and eloped, their spawn would be Cele.. huh?! Oh yes, i mean coe on chap the Police HQ in Pretoria is prime example of some stupid thinking within a brain that has clearly hit its maxi um potential.. just saying..

Scouring the net, I found an interesting piece in States on home std testing..Mmm..;. what? Yes, to avoid embarrassment and cost, there has been an introduction in a kit that allows the user to test for std's themselves.  Kits are mailed in a plain envelope with the swab, questionnaire, information about STDs and consent form, you then return teh swab and hea the results two weeks later.. Nice initiative to get dudes doing their own to stay safe.. So apparently some people have been ordering a couple of kits like one a week!! ha ha.. dad: "ah son, another plain envelope arrived for you today and the mailman said there was a stench from the last one you tried to send"..

Did you oaks hear about Malcolm X's daughter.. she has been arrested on charges of identity theft and then use it to get bills of $50 000.. Malcolm x's daughter.. I mean one, your an Icon to millions of people, or rather your name is, so i'm sure you don't need to be stealing all kinds of shit to drag your daddy's name through the mud.. I mean douche!! I would disown the witch and say she is not related to the family.. Its this kind of stupidity that annoys me.. Smart decision was bypassed and the consequences are being lived.. good.. shit if i had half that surname I would most certainly be pushing Obama out the way... I would be in the whites house decorating it right now.. shit, Jackson Pollock and everything on the walls! Feck what a clown, let her ass rot in jail, she'll write a speech called "I HAD a dream"..in jail.. ha ha..

So if you've ever been to Boston and ridden the train then consider yourself lucky.. One dumb imbecilic commuter went on the train(red line if it matters) with her snake, a Boa Constrictor called Penelope.. Guess what happened.. yes you guessed it, she lost the snake on the train.. How in the world you do that i have no fucking clue, its a fricken snake about a 1m.. I would've sued the bitch, i swear.. I would've been fricken out, yet the snake was lost for about a month!  A MONTH, do you know how long that is? You try not eating for a week and then come to me, so imagine what it must've been like? Every ankle must've looked like a rodent to the snake.. shame.. poor Penelope.. A commuter spotted it, adn it was finally reunited with its owner.. Had i seen that, i would've  jumped through a window ran to the next station, taken a taxi to the nearest airport, boarded a flight to Iceland.. yea bitch Iceland.. out this mafucker! ha ha ha.. '

Oh in some other snakey news, did u see that Zuma had to make some evasive manoeuvring to avoid the protests that had surrounded him in the Ivory Coast? That clown was nearly taken apart(how funny would that be, all the hassle he has gone through[court case/rape charges/Thabo Mbeki]) only to be killed in the coast of Ivory.. ha ha.. alas he was swept away by his security team after locals surrounded his vehicle and were tuning him! They don't even smuk you over there JZ.. chuck pal.. and quick you fricken douche.. almost like hearing that soulless bastard Shrien Dewani didn't try and commit suicide.. please pal, do you think he accidentally took 17 pills he was allergic too.. ha ha.. yea almost like tripping and falling with  your honey stick into land different honey pots eh Tiger? ha ha.. come on dude you tried to commit cause your ass is as guilty as Zuma's son hating tenders.. lol. get real, some a dumb.. we are not..

Gadaffi Vows To Die A Martyr – Moammar Gadaffi vowed to die in Libya as a martyr in an angry tv address on Tuesday, as eastern regions had broken free from his rule in a burgeoning revolt. ”I am not going to leave this land, I will die here as a martyr,” Gadaffi said on state tv, refusing to bow to calls from his own diplomats, soldiers and protesters clamouring in the streets for an end to his four decades at the helm. ”I shall remain here defiant,” said Gadaffi. [mail&guardian] ah ha.. yes clown YOU will die.. not maybe a martyr, more like a dumb douche who should've chucked or been fair.. BUT no.. you wanted to kill soldiers forv not killing protesters, you wanted to bomb civilians.. now you will be sliced and diced.. (maybe) or just hung.. Do some good, change the world or at least help your people..argh.. leaders take note: you serve the people.. not the other way.. Societal justice will catch u, and they have no mercy!

What kak is this: Vancouver Still World’s Most Liveable City - Vancouver topped the list of the world’s most liveable cities for the fifth straight year, while Melbourne claimed second place from Vienna and Australian and Canadian cities dominated the list’s top 10 spots. In the annual survey by the Economist Intelligence Unit, the Canadian west coast city and 2010 Winter Olympics host scored 98 percent... seriously in canada? Come the f on.. sorry don't believe this study, no ways.. Canada? that cold desolate land where french/english/amercian come together? Um no.. who does the study get its results from? No pretoria on the list? Come on.. at least Uitenhage.. the sphincter of SA.. ha ha.. this is nonsense, bloody agents! ha ha.. Canada? NoBushmans River or COffee Bay? top: Vancouver, Canada

2. Melbourne, Australia

3. Vienna, Austria

4. Toronto, Canada

5. Calgary, Canada

6. Helsinki, Finland
7. Sydney, Australia

8. Perth, Australia

8. Adelaide, Australia
10. Auckland, New Zealand

Well on the other side of the spectrum there is the most unliveable cities in the world  and guess.. our neighbours in Zim.. Zimbabwe's capital Harare is the least livable city in the world, according to the latest annual survey by the Economist Intelligence Unit. The ranking is based on stability, healthcare, culture and environment, education, and infrastructure.. mmm.. okay that  sounds fair.. sorry Zimbos..

Feck.. wednesday.. last few days push it..

TAUNTED..

 

Andy Roddicks wife.. Hot charna

The Hefs new squeezer and future.. she must love him.. ha ha ha.. NOT..

TOUGH TYRANTS TAUNTING

So.. its a new morning.. and what a morning it was to wake up to..

Hectic stuff going down in Christchurch NZ, so far its looking pretty bad and sending all condolences to those over there.. Its not cool, not cool at all and we hope for a speedy recovery.. if the crusaders field is fucked, chilled, if Dan Carter is alive stoked injured, better.. ha ha.. jokes we wish nothing of the sort.. Although to the safas we told "don't leave, and they left, see what happens outside SA, EVERYTHING" shit  i told you oaks.. i said it.. sa looking a little greener hey?  Be safe and make it happen..

This is the second time this am I write this blog as my computer froze and I lost everything.. what's that you say.. Save? Fuck off.. fricken online savers.. save this... douchebag!

Speaking of douchebags..oaks were arrested in Zimbabwe for watching a vid ona  projector that was highlighting some of the recent spate of attacks in the middle east, stuff from Cairo and Libya.. so what happened? They got arrested.. why? Who knows cause they live in Zim and Mugabs thinks they might pose a danger to his government.. Come on old man, oaks watching a vid scares you? Then fuck off, leave, die anything, I can honestly say this without a vote, more people want Mugabe dead/gone/just out then they want him to eat in the morning and take a shit.. Seriously, send the contract over here.. we'll deal with him, ass clown!! argh what a douche! Next minute you will get arrested for thinking that your government is a piece of shit led by a DICKtator..

Shrien Dewani tried to commit suicide.. can you spell "shit i'm busted" what a Cbomb.. seriously.. come murder your wife in Cape Town, tarnish our image and then shoot bak to the UK to look like a man who just lost his wife? Nortoise tortoise, you are fucked and when we get you back here you're going to Poolsmoor pal, make sure you watch out for the 28s the like sweet ass.. you fricken douche.. apparently this ass has lost 12kg, ha ha.. loser and tried to kill himself by taking an overdose of pills.. Mmm... man knows he's fucked and tried the easy way.. ha ha.. nope.. you are living, boarding an SAA flight back to SA.. if i was him, i woud've found a double barrel shotgun to make sure.. ha ha.. ass..

Speaking of ass.. did you oaks hear about the cop who gave a chap a lift.,. and then raped him? .Yes raped him, plundered his mine shaft.. hey officer can I get I lift? Sure you can.. after I rape you bitch.. hectic.. so dudes.. you are not safe from rape from the men who police our society.. Feck.. who polices the police? The 5.0 seem to be able to do what eever the fuck they want, rogue cops everywhere.. why? I miss the scorpions.. they did not fuck around.. they would sort shit out.. shit.. I mean what happened to the days when it was honourable to be a cop and save lives.. now its th legal way of becoming a criminal!.. They should make Ian Khama (president of Botswana) in charge of the police force.. that man would sort shit out yesterday.. He's fucking crazy, crazy in the belief that society has gone a bit nuts.. The police man who raped the guy must've got home and been like.. yummy what a nice litle snack.. I would've gone to the dudes house when he was sleeping with my Machete and give him the snip.. at the base of his manhood.. disgusting F*head!

My man on the ground (Gary-theone-on the-ground) has submitted this article: a million home owners in Gauteng who pay for "armed crime reaction" where private security companies react AFTER the crime has taken place

This service costs on average R250 p.m. Therefore 1,000,000 x R240.00 x 12 months x 14% VAT, generates R403 million in tax revenue for the SA Govt!

A car thief steals a R500,000 car and receives between R10,000 and R30,000 for his deed. The car owner is paid out by insurance and then purchases another similar vehicle, on which
he pays 14% VAT of approx R70,000 as a direct result of crime. Who profited the most? The thief or the SA Govt?

We must begin with a mechanism whereby the SA Govt is forced to reconsider this unconstitutional and immoral practice of profiting from crime!

All South Africans should demand that all payments related to protection of life and property should be VAT free and Tax deductible!

This principle should also apply to replacement of stolen property as well as estate duty. If a person dies as a result of crime we should also demand that estate duty not be paid. How much do you think the SA Govt. has made out of estate duty from the murders of 1300 South African farmers?

The S.A. Govt likes to compare us to overseas. Well overseas your safety and security is covered by your income tax and is tax deductible!

It is time that South Africans stood together and made the Govt. and public aware of the Govt's "income" from crime. In the meantime crime is the goose that lays the golden egg .
 written by some dude on news 24 site

Some lighter news..ha ha ha.. lighter news.. read on.. a teenage girl in the UK has been crowned the quarter of a ton teenager.. whoo hoo.. How much does she way? um.. 250kg.. Is that enough to prop for the sharks? No she has more skill then them..(ohhh.. shark hate) but rather wat the fuck?? ha ha.. this chick is standing in the picture looking like the Michelin Man made love to the Oros dude and out popped a fully grown round teen.. She's smiling and stuff and i'm thinking.. the chicks mom is an ass.. her dad.. an ass.. the round chick is a HUGE ass.. why oh why..? At 566lbs she weighs teh same as a Harley Davidson Sportster 48 motorbike, 619 tins of baked beans.. and four super lihtweight boxers like Amir khan! The parents should be sued and then the daughter should eat them.. seriously.. thats not a happy moment in the family.. def, not a kodak moment.. They needed a wide lens to snap the picture.. She's so big she has 2 face book pages.. ha ha ha.. She's so big when you tweet to her you need to include two locations! haha.. I made those up.. you can tell.. ha haa..

In

Apparently Gerrad Pique(Barcelona player[man united defector]) is dating and im sad to say Shakira.. why do ladies do this to themselves.. I hate that guy.. Only because he is good and should've stayed at the theatre of dreams.. but celebrities and footballers suck at keeping shit on the DL and being good boyfriends and husbands,.. ha ha.. ask Chelsea fans, half their team are PLAYaS.. not players playas.. ha ha.. and Ronaldo who dipped his honey stick into the same doll causing Italian prime minister some trouble.. you know the one, the 18yr who is a total SLUT and digs it.. She got paid by CR7 for a kiff session in Milan when she was 17.(last year). he paid her 4000 euros.. If i was CR7 (Cristiano Ronaldo) i would go get my cash back ASAP.. is it me or can chicks not keep quiet? ha ha.. jokes sexism 101 is tomorrow!!

Dudes and dudettes, have a sick day..

TAUNTED.

My boy signing again..

Monday Maggot Mania

It's been a weekend.. many of you did some serious maring(going nuts) and others took it easy, soaked up Friday activities and pushed on with some great sporting activities. Others helped their sons and daughters rack up some serious shares in government contracts ahem(Zuma and family). I've decided, I need to become a mate to a government official, its better than crime, the benefits are well as we can all see amazing, billion rand contracts. The Sunday Times reported yesyerday that Zuma's son, Duduzane, is a director and a shareholder of Afripalm Horizons, which entered into a lucrative deal with China Railway Construction Corporation. The Chinese parastatal is one of the companies involved in the multi-billion-rand rail projects recently announced by Transport Minister S'bu Ndebele.
"... that places them at the forefront to cash in on the government's R550-billion rail infrastructure programme," the Sunday Times reported.  Shit dudes, let me in on this, I am a goo relative and then i can spread the wealth to all...(my friends and family) duh.. well if you still thinking that voting for certain party well enrich you and the the country then you my friend are a CLASS A house n*gga. Sorry i said it, I'm tired of complaining, complaining about the state of affairs of the country, continued with this petulance of voting for the ruling party.. wake up, smell the roses, or your neighbours cause they won't be any roses for YOU bitch!

Speaking of things vulgar, i have received some comments as to the amount of profanity contained within these blogs, well yes it is a lot.. I use it to express my feelings and intent, and feel some of this douches don't deserve language fitting of a gentleman, so fuck them,  and if it appears to be to much for you visit this site and fuck off: http://www.barbie.com/ ..

The luck of the draw with sites such as Wikileaks is that the truth is spoken, and thus why there is an uproar of banter regarding the matter.. I dig the wikileaks dude, he let the truth be heard by the rest of the world.. Dudes don't like that and therefore he is in shit, do you honestly think if he was speaking crap, being another useless tabloid kakster we would be hearing so much, or in some cases, a lot of nothing.. Ah 'cause govts don't like their secrets being shared with the "common" man, why? Cause in the greater scheme of things the govt works for us, not the other way.. So in order to harness your opinion we are kept in the dark.. yes.. YOU.. Wiki said FUCK that and let you into the dark world that is nation politics.. In the latest 'peek into wiklileaks,

According to a United States Embassy cable obtained by City Press, the ANC is a “complete mess”. According to the cable, the ANC’s Gauteng spokesman, Dumisa Ntuli, told a US diplomat that the party was being crippled by internal division .. the funny thing is DUH.. SOME of us knew this, as was said by another site 2oceans, apparently you need evidence to witness this.. Shit some of the switched on individuals have been peering through the ANC cloak of invisibility and sorry chaps my wand is stronger than yours, and we can see we are being fcked..
“The younger cadres have no interest in the history of the ANC. They want access to jobs and personal enrichment.”[Source : News24] Oh so basically the younger dudes are trying to get rich.. I see.. mmm.. thanks wiki, there you go chaps.. proof.. we're being mind fucked, get me a head condom, cause seriously i feel the pounding..

ha ha ha... did you oaks hear of Bono not knowing who Steve-the-Hof-meyer was after the recent blah blah with him and the protest songs..  Despite the comments that local singer Steve Hofmeyr made about superstar Bono from the rock group U2, the lead singer apparently has no clue who Hofmeyr is, said Attie van Wyk, owner and executive head of Big Concerts.. Ha ha.. steve you fricken ass.. ha ha ha.. um i can imagine Bono in his shades, going "who the f*** is this steve gaylord?' ha ha.. steve chill out.. douche..

A sad day for the fat kids, KFC is dropping "finger lickin good" as their slogan.. yikes, all you round people remember how you used to Q for that slogan, in that long ass line at lunch.. ha ha.. "i'm gonna get me some chicken" ha ha.. well they have changed it to, "So good".. BRAND changing if you ask me, that slogan has been around longer some of the uneducated government officials that make laws and "enrich" our country.. epic.. Its for the better, i agree obesity is a problem with the fast food(soooo good.. ).. remember when a streetwise 2 was 9.90.. ha ha.. when chicken was chicken, and even your mama would get KFC for you to stay at school longer?! Those were the days, now pursuit of profit, greed, stupidity and doucheness now has bought the slanting of fast foods.. Its almost frowned upon to grab a no 1 from Mc'ds or a bucket of the colonial goodness(heaven forbid a BUCKET.. i still love that..) I love it so much, i once used the KFC bucket as a utensil holder during exams. So i would be at my desk and the examiner goes, "One hour left" and i would look at the bucket and go..nearly there colonial..nearly there.. I passed all exams.. )

Cricket world cup started.. whoo hoo.. exacto.. has it been me or is the cricket world cup very um... half the balloons and face paint?! Maybe as we sit in 2010 wake(thanks FIFA you fuck heads, where are the legaciess you promised?) The cricket world cup barely drew me away from Home makeover edition(awesome).. although I will back the Proteas till the end..(not soon, not soon not soon) and hopefully will be treated to some good cricket, if not then don't hog the channel, you know i know, if its boring change that shit, i would rather watch Jeremy mags on media then Canada vs Ireland.. no offense.. but stuff that..

Nice weekend for sport.. SUper Rugby was awesome to get you back, like my mate Gary said, relationships are going to be tested.. ha ha.. big time.. Ma'Nonu you fricken douche! your on my fantasy league, fucK! Cost-a-joe.. argh! Mr Chelsea Ancellotti.. do you think you will have a job till Aug 2011? I'm going with no, nawtus tortoise, negative, not a chance.. you are out..ha h haa ha.. Torres you must be loving life over there, ha ha.. bet you thought you would be playing champions league.. maybe not.. ha ha ha.. ass! The gunners.. come on chaps.. nothing more.. you guys know what needs to be done.. come on, load on that ammo.. UNITED: chalking up wins, not pretty but done. dusted. Oh and United's neighbours City, had a good game this weekend, but their team is made up of assholes, eg Mario balotelli.. that fricken guy is dick always angry, WHY? gets paid loads for a job i hope he enjoys yet he is always sulking, did you go to jailo for 27 years? Were you not allowed at an "white beach"? NO? Then fuck off you spoilt brat, serious Mancini, be a man and spank his ass!

I won't lie it looks like a shit week coming up.. make the most of it..
TAunTed.

She looks keen for a little "thai" massage

70yr old massage chick

PS: If you want a massage with some added benefits try this place in the states, besides a nice back massage you can get a little slap and tickle.. you know the kind, where happy endings come.. and you leave satisfied and leave a R10 tip? ha ha.. well they got cuffed, but the ladies involved are well.. below par.. and they had a 70 old on the menu too.. ha ha.. can any one say granny fetish?' ha ha..

Taunted again!

Festive Friday F*cking Finally!

ITS THE WEEKEND BABY... well nearly, for some they have been hammered for a couple of hours now! lol.. but if your ass is in Joburg YOU must be experiencing some billing issues with your elec and water! Today oaks are protesting(in south Africa, NO ways..ha ha) yes, again, that's how we do it, protest bitches protest.. if first you dont succeed, protest bitches PROTEST! Well these fuckers known as the Johannesburg municipality are fucking useless, one because they don't care, and two they dont care if you don't have electricity. Like last month they cut us off because we were ONE DAY late from paying, as i type this, there are dudes who still haven't paid from last year with their underfloor heating and HD's blasting away..Chilled, we paid now we want it back on, you would think so.. BUT no, they didn't put it on for 3 days! 3 days we had nothing but darkness and torches.. We called ESKOM like a million time, swore, begged, kissed ass, NOTHING.. then i was following around by the mains outside the house(the one eskom fiddles with) and saw i had some kind of cable tie locking it, broke it..ooops and flipped a switch! WHAM BAM electricity was back on, fuck eskom I thought like a TOPCAT and did that shit, the dudes came to put it on the next evening at 11pm! fuckers.. I have to tell you, i hate eskom like Mugabe hates democracy and fair play, like Zuma hates monogamy and how Jason Stratham hates bad movies! ha ha ha.. fuck eskom.. oaks keep protesting them.. dont be violen but scare the shit out of them.. elections are coming and they want your vote.. MAKE THEM EARN IT (or buy it.. ps3?)

Speaking of things blown up and round Sheyla Hershey, 31, had her KKK-size implants removed in September after suffering an infection during an operation to have them blown up to an even-larger MMM cup, according to Britain's The Sun.Since then, Hershey, who is married with children, has been distraught, saying that she feels "so ugly" without her breasts.. ha ha.. she feels so ugly, bitch wake the fuck up, YOU been ugly with those gigantic fucking flotation devices..I do feel bad as she tried to kill herself, but DID not succeed, second mistake, you should've put  gun in your mouth stupid bitch.she tried to end her life with pills(rookie). "Once I reclaim my identity as the world's biggest boobs I can be a better role model for my daughter," she told the paper. Dudes please someone head back up there and help her finish the job.. seriously..

They've made a beer in Mexico that is for gay dudes, this beer is marketed at gay people.. my question is SO gay people drink differently? ha ha.. fuck, i wanna say this is going  to be a bad investment, just saying.. We're out in the market with great respect with the idea of offering a product directed to the gay-lesbian community that has been ignored for too long but is important and very demanding", Dude you did not do business at school did u? Huh? feck imagine if SAB was like, "hey lets make gay beer and call it, Castle gaylight.. um.. #shaking my head! waste of time..

hello super 15.. I love this time of the year, there is so much sport on.. its ridonculus.. i mean.. rugby, football and crickey world cup.. if you a not a sport lady and ur man is a sports man, go get a hair cut and a new man.. ha ha.. im super amped.. fuck summer, its supersport overboard.. HD/pvr and ROONEY.. that's right bitches whoo hoo.. ha ha.. next couple of weeks, i might as well be president of South Africa cause i ain't doing anything usefull! ha ha..

Did u oaks hear about the STUPID c*cksucker who sent a chain letter to his office peeps which depicted some racist tendencies such as the title, old school motor biking, and white dudes riding the black dudes.. so this oak sent it to his office, thinking its fricken funny(mmmmm....already i know this guy is fuck head and not clever either) and a couple of dudes in this office(a white dude) was like "china this racist" the dude sent it to his mates and black boss.. ha ha.. want to guess what will happen in the disciplinary hearing? ha ha.. ya he is going to get a raise.. a raise to get the fuck outta there ha ha ha..

Leading the front for future antics is this chap, now i dig Stevie H.. I've been his personal bitch for a gig and he was a kiff dude with a refreshing sense on life.. then i was checking out what he did with his U2 tickets.. Hofmeyr took offence at incorrect reports that U2 lead singer Bono supported ANC Youth League leader's Julius Malema's singing of the struggle song and threw his tickets to the U2 concert, which had cost him R5000, into the Jukskei River . Hofmeyr said yesterday: "Today, if you sing Kill the Boer, you are singing of a situation that is happening right now.  Stevie stevie, you dumb shit, should've given those tickets to me, i would've out that shit on Gumtree, and we could sing any song together.. i just dig stevecause he's not afraid of who he is.. neither is he that incompetent over the weekends, but mon-fri.. he can be a dumb shit.. ha ha..

So these girls did this video in LA where they put a camera on their butts, and recorded how people watched their asses.. ha ha.. finally oaks we are cuffed.. and i know you chaps, I see you guys catching glance and why the fuck not? ha ha.. I mean ladies if you have something nice in the rear and you wearing them tight jeans, obviously creeps(i mean guys) are going to take a peek, if they don't they are lying, or gay.. simple, man truth 101.. I think that should be a daily thing MAN TRUTHS as some of you are lacking the universal truth and believe in prince charming, that's right they exist, but they exist within the creep too.. or he's gay.. ha ha ha..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xq0JcQ1dOwU


Dudes and dudettes have a wicked weekend... get a job if have none, call in sick if you do..
TAunted!